Just Thankful.

I’m not sure what’s been happening to me lately.  I can’t seem to go to a bible study, worship service or Wal-Mart without being overcome by the greatness of God. The reason I say I’m not sure what’s happening is because there is really nothing spectacular about this season of life.  Most of us probably recall on one or two hands the number of seasons in our lives where we have felt with no uncertainty God’s good great presence at work in our lives.  Often those seasons exist within times of grief, loss, fear, answered prayer, unexplained miracles or times of great joy – the times we are actively looking for Him; the times we need to give thanks or to cry out.

However, when life is feeling “normal”, we are likely to begin slipping into the habit of taking Him for granted.  The times when your family has enough money, everyone is healthy, relationships are good, you know, the “normal” times. Those are the seasons we begin to assume God’s existence rather than acknowledge it, much less actively search for it.

That’s why I’m surprised and really quite thankful that in this quiet and maybe mundane season of my life, I’ve never been more aware of His goodness. This just might be the best time in life to feel that. I have nothing to point towards other than Him. I’m not thanking Him for a cleared test result, praising him for a healthy baby or crying out to Him at the loss of someone dear. I’m just thanking.

Some might say, Lauren, it’s Christmas – everyone is close to Jesus this time of year. I call bull on that because last year, I was in basically the same place of progress in my life and guess what? I gave two rips about the fact that it was Christmas. I was utterly disinterested in the Christmas to-do list and overall would have stated that I was unmoved by the season. This year, nothing has drastically changed, no traumatic or life-altering events have taken place and yet, I’m simply overcome.

I have sat in church the last few weekends on the verge of tears just because of where I was. Not because of the sermon, the worship or even the time of month. Just thankful. I’m here and so is He and it’s so so good.

Dear God, please let me stay in this place forever. Please God may I keep my eyes on You and You keep your grip on me. Lord, I feel better than I ever have in my whole life. Let me please somehow pass this on to everyone around me. I pray God you could use me. Don’t ever let go God. I love You so much. In Your name, Amen.