XO

Years ago when I started this blog I thought it would be a fun tradition to write Happy Birthday posts to my 3 kids, telling them about what their favorite song was that year. Not only did I take a hiatus from blogging but many years went by that I didn’t know what to write to them because it had been a hard year. Well, I want to get back to it and challenge myself even when I feel like I have nothing noteworthy to say.

Here is what I wrote to Brelynn the year she turned 6 (a mere 5 years ago – yikes!).

On your sixth birthday you have lived with us for 2 years, 4 months and 6 days. On your sixth birthday you are hoping for an umbrella and want sausage and pepperoni pizza for dinner. On your sixth birthday your favorite song is XO, covered by John Mayer (originally by Beyoncé).

Your love is bright as ever,
even in the shadows.
Baby kiss me,
before they turn the lights out.

On your sixth birthday I am worried. Worried that of all the songs we listen to the one you want to hear all the time has a rather large focus on kissing and boys. I am worried not because I think little of your judgment but because I think so much of your bravery, your intelligence and your incredible strength.

My hope for you on your sixth birthday is that your enthusiasm for this song is due to the creative genius of are Beyoncé and John Mayer and NOT because you are longing for love or thinking that love comes from kissing boys.

So let me make it clear: You, my darling, are more than someone who will be loved by a boy. You have more to offer than a kiss. I pray you grow up to know that. So that when you find someone to love and who loves you back you will love them from a place of wholeness. A place of assuredness. A place that says, “Because I love who I AM I can’t stand to NOT love you.”

 “Find the love you seek, by first finding the love within yourself. Learn to rest in that place within you that is your true home.”― Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

When I think of the trials put before you at such a young age and the brave face you have always put on, I think ‘wow’, this is a girl who will one day be a woman staring down giants with great ease. I can’t help but be amazed at how well you are doing in school, how easily you make friends, how sweet you are to younger kids. The thing I want you to know is that none of your successes have anything to do with dad or I. It’s all you, who you are, who you were born to be. Brave. Smart. Strong. Loved. A child of God.

Happy sixth birthday Brelynn.

XO,
Mom